The Emily Post

Ah social niceties, which one must learn to master in order to make it in today's society. Well at least if you want to have friends, build camaraderie with people, successfully do business, find that significant other, etc. (i.e. So you won't be regarded as a cocky, rude, self-centered ape of a man.) Me, not quite an ape, but I'm still working on my phrases and line delivery. Considering:

I've done this a million times (hopefully not that many), run into someone, and you are obligated to at least minimally smile and say your Hi's and How are you's, Goodbye's, etc. It always comes out wrong somehow andI laugh at myself afterwards (probably the other party is too).

Acquaintance/Friend: "What's up?"
Me: "Pretty good"

Or the variation:

Acquaintance/Friend: "How are you?"
Me: "Nothing much."

And then there's saying "Hi, how are you?" and walking off before the other party has a chance to respond. This one I'm been the recipient more often than not. It is more trivial than the aforementioned mismatched responses I'd say but can be perceived as slightly rude. It happened a lot at college - between classes or what not, you run into an acquaintance/friend, and then:

1) Don obligatory smile
2) "Hi, good to see you! How are you?"
3) Turn your head and keep on walking on.

But that's aight since all of us had somewhere to go. Be it class, the library, the apartment, The Fountain to hang out with the alternative crowd we fondly dubbed "The Fountain People.", well not really. You get the idea.

Yes people skills. Be good at dealing with people. So easy, yet so hard sometimes.


UPDATED: A fellow blogspot blogger left me a comment which reminded of the other cultural zeitgeit: the manly male nod greeting. Yes, you know what I'm talking about. Because us guys want to retain our manhood, yet still acknowledge our fellow brother without looking woosy or sensitive, we see each other and greet with a 2-3 inch lift of the jaw, in conjunction with a hearty "I'm cool, yo what up dawg" grin.

We should all tip our hat to the nod, for it's enabled us apely men to keep our dignity while allowing us to bond and share our predilection for man's atavistic nature. May we all remember the Lord of the Flies and how that tapped in each of us the desire to remember that men are men. Give the nod a nod. Oh and don't forget the lesser popular, "been a long time. man" arms held open wide, and lean back, with the nod and a smile., which we'll save to talk about on a rainy day...


"Well-well look. I already told you: I deal with the g*&^%$! customers so the engineers don't have to. I have people skills; I am good at dealing with people. Can't you understand that? What the h*&^ is wrong with you people? " - Tom Smykowski, Office Space